Expectations... it's ubiquitous and exists in myriad forms. It's infused in everyone's lives. Its difficult to acknowledge and impossible to avoid..
I have always encountered a fork in my road to individuality. Often times facing dilemma between being the perfect son /brother/ friend/ colleague and being simply me. I am just exhausted giving so much thought to making decisions from the mundane to the monumental. It is difficult to just be myself when i feel as if every decision i make paves my expressway to perdition.
Just be yourself. Live for yourself. You only have one life. Live happy and die happy[ sounds like a corny Chinese movie] . It's your life. I have had heard enough of these and people's every other twisted rendition of Bon Jovi. To you all out there, cut the crap with me.
I have to a certain extent, managed to live by my own terms and be ignorant of societies expectations. Sadly, you can only paddle so much when you are in choppy waters before simply succumbing to the currents. Funny thing is i tend to rebel again after catching a breather in the name of surrender.
I wanted to play computer games, instead i was expected to build websites. I wanted to pursue College, instead i was expected to pursue Polytechnic. I wanted to parachute off from a plane with my friends, instead i am expected to head on down to the coffeeshop by the rubbishchute with my friends. I wanted to scuba dive, instead i am expected to buy a bath tub and a rubber duckie. The list will go on forever. The irritating thing however is that i will not be denied in my face.. its always a subtle and diplomatic procedure.. Often times the situation is such that i would be the non understanding and selfish party in the negotiations.
" I will not forbid you from jumping off the plane if thats what that matters more to you than us"... How la like this...
Imagine you got an opportunity to do something that you always wanted, and your partner/loved ones is/are like " i dun like it.... if you really want to go then its really up to you". How is one to achieve what he/she sets out to do when he/she does not have the encouragement and blessings of his/her loved ones... Even if i decide to go solo on my mission, the guilt of hurting my loved ones to achieve something that i like, doesn't go easy on me.
I am not saying that my achievements and aspirations are dictated by others around me totally. In fact i can post a longer entry when i view these issues from an individualistic perspective. Neither am i saying that all that i am is what society has made out of me...i am merely saying that expectation is like the wind that acts as the resistance when we are trying to break the land speed record..
2 comments:
Well, it's almost impossible to breathe in this society full of expectations.
It's tiring tryin to live up to these expectations. Many times, we just have to do things to please people, so that we can keep their mouth shut, keep them from putting us down any further.
(Sidetrack a bit)Yea, it sounds crappy when advice like 'it's your life, live for youself' is injected into your ears. but sometimes, this is so much a friend can offer, a listening ear.
Your friend can't pave the road for you. He can't your life for you. He may not have the right to tell you what is right for you.
It will be good enough to know that he is right behind you to catch you when you fall.
Expectations in the society we live like u mentioned are ubiqitous. but at the end of the day, we lead the lives thus we make the choices. if its a pure desire or opportunity (that does no harm to anyone), i dun c y u cannot carry on with it. its all about having a clear conscience and making thr right choices.
loved ones are meant to egg u on. sometimes, if u cant get the support u desire, then it just might be time to ponder if ur asking the right people. (I dun mean the older gen like parents here cos they simply are older and their thoughts are narrow).
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