training woes and my dinner date.

Sometimes i wonder, what have i gotten myself into...
Paying so much money to go and climb out of all things, a mountain. Sacrificing quite a number of weekends on training. Spending quite a bit on the return journey home( which is often by cab).
Tormenting my already strained knee. Is it all worth it in the end? Well if it feels like today's training session, then it really is worth it... It has been such a long time since i perspired like this... I was drenched a quarter way through the trail. I got re- affiliated with my army boots.. Brought back so much memories as well. I must admit, i have toned my butt to an extent where i do not see one where it used to be at all...All my pants are flat at the back, think i need to invest in a buttsimizer pants... But on a serious note, it feels so good to feel so tired and worn out...

~~~~~~~~~

On a lighter note, i had a very wonderful date on friday even though i was dead beat after work... I went shopping with her at Vivo City, then had a wonderful (cheap and well under budget) dinner at harbourfront. Caught up alot, then we proceeded to the quiet and dimly lit harbour side... we took a short walk before we sat down along the habour side.. we talked for hours.. i didn't realize the time flying when i was with her, totally amused by her antics and her cute gestures and her totally tortured articulation in Tamil... must admit she does look much better now thanks to her ....errr.. mass enhancements ( she doesn't like it if i say that she has extra flesh now) ...well.. if i could only get close enough to her to.... squash her ........ nose like i always do.... wouldn't you scream at me Shalini V? like you always did back then? haha.. anyway sha, we gotta do this catching up more often.

~~~~~~~~~
too tired to type already gonna knock off...

I just do not get it.....

"TODAY"- 25/04/2007

I just really do not get it.. seriously..holistically i have to pay more for my basic provisions and amenities while i get to pay lesser for a car that i do not own and for petrol that i am not going to purchase.

It's like, you know, a poor man goes into a clothing store, begging for clothes to safe guard his modesty but gets slammed in the face... But when a celebrity who can afford all the clothes in the world walks in, he/she gets the entire purchase F.O.C....

PS: i am not anti government( i love my country :) ), simply put i just do not understand how this works.. thalae... care to explain this to me..

The Race

Mount Faber Run 2007

Pre-Run State of Mind:

18/4/2007 : - " looking forward to the weekends.... need my well deserved rest... i need to laze around"

19/4/2007 : - " need to do my i.e.ps.... need to submit my projected goals... damn... 5 more weeks din... hang in there...."


19/4/2007 : - "what movie shall i catch on sunday.. who shall i call??"

20/4/2007: - " i am so tired... i need a massage... "

20/4/2007: - " din.. put away the paperwork.. get a life da.. go out... "

20/4/2007: - " blank........"

21/04/2007: - [early in the morning] " twiggies... i want twiggies..."

21/04/2007: - [phone rings] " din u up for the run tomorrow? i haven't yet train leh.. can make it or not ?"
- [reply] "can can no problem.... [hung up] "

21/04/2007: - " twiggies... i want more twiggies.."

21/04/2007: - "SHIT!!!! I GOT A RACE TOMORROW."

21/04/2007: - " hmmmm... twiggies"


Post-Run State of mind :




Yours insincerely, Raascal.

New Design ... again...

Yup it is a new design for raascal ... again.
dunno why.. changing the designs acts as a form of stress relief for me.. so anticipate more changes on this site..

current d-sign is pulling in extreme and mixed reviews. some say that it looks great... some, just feel it is too boring and repulsive... well guess what this is my blog.. you will only see what i want to see.

anyway, so many things coming up.. case conferences, mizuno run (this sunday) and the much awaited Mt K.

Have not trained a bit for the run.. partially my knees are giving problems and as well i was never taking it competitively. just in it for the t-shirt... as the same for ali, safi, rafi, val and etc.

lets see the outcome on that day.. till then.. sha, dunt expect a post from me.

into the indebted world ...... loans....

It is disheartening and often times, painful and burdening.. But no one can escape it.. with the exception of the filthy rich.

Loans.. loans and more loans..

Every single thing seems to have loans appending it. My entire life seems suffocated with loans. Not that i am bankrupt or anything (place your hands on your head and say "touch wood"). Lets just reflect a bit here.. It is a enormous vicious cycle. These examples are just the tip of the ice berg as to why you are going to need a financial loan.

• If you want to study (dip or deg) - study loans.
• When you want to settle down and buy a house - housing loans
• When you want to buy a car - Car loans
• When you want to start being your own boss - Business loans, Bank loans
• When you are in need of urgent cash - James loans, POSB loans (any bank loans) or our favourite loan sharks.
• Even when you want to read something - Library book loans...

Ok, maybe the last one does not count. Then there are times when you are forced to take a loan even if you do not want to. Like as in paying for my Diploma with my dads CPF.. i am forced to pay him back even if he does not want me to do so.

It is very disheartening to know that a graduate is going to start his life with a huge debt.
It is painful to know that you do not really "own" the car that you drive.
It is burdening to start a family with housing loans burning your income ..
Loans have removed the joy from living.. instead we are plagued by constant insecurities and paranoia as to whether we can sustain our incomes to settle the loans. What do we really own then... when even the 6 feet deep grave seems to be loaned to us .... sigh.

Common Healthcare woes.... the bloody knees.

i got to face it.. i am getting old.. enough of living in my glory days.. "when i was 18 i was like this, like that... yadda yadda yadda...." .. now i do not even dare to charge for the ball without thinking about the possible outcomes of my agile stunts... often times i get off with a few crack sounds from my knee.. I just hope the day when my knee gives a "pop" sound never comes. If i had only been a little bit more mindful of my body when i was in NS... i wouldn't be suffering so much right now.
what is done.. is done.. anyway just some posting for all my other friends with knee problems..
and also for those without any knee problems too...

Knee Problems
- Brief intro on what else??? KNEE PROBLEMS..

http://www.cnn.com/HEALTH/library/DS/00555.html
- some readings on knee problems.

Indian to the core... haha

Guys we gotta do this ....come on...


I Want A Curry And Rice Girl - Amazing videos are here


One of my favourite ads.


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the balance i guess..

Why gifted children don’t become eminent adults

March 22, 2007 in Smartkit All Posts, Creativity, Genius by Dr. R.L. Kaplan

Why is it that the majority of highly talented kids never go on to become eminent adults in their field of giftedness?

Came across an interesting article on the Northwestern University website that discusses some of the personality characteristics of those who do actually go on to become eminent adults; here is a summary:

• Preference for solitude which typically begins in childhood
• Lack of concern with conventionality, especially social conventions
• Extraordinary ability to cope with tension. History of stressful
  childhoods with tense and even traumatizing family situations
• High drive and energy. Workaholics. Many forego marriage, children and other normal joys of life because they fear it will detract from their dedication to their work

Another interesting factor mentioned in the article, which I’ve heard before, is that many eminent individuals lost a parent in childhood or adolescence

Article is from http://www.smart-kit.com/s466/why-gifted-children-dont-become-eminent-adults/

Child's Brain Teaser

i got this wrong the first time round.... try doing this and post it in the comments pls...
u can try googling for the answer as well.

One day a truck delivered a box of new animals to the pet store. Hannah needed to count the number of animals. When she peeked in, she saw many snakes and tarantulas all mixed up! She counted 18 heads and 64 legs.

How many snakes were in the box and how many tarantulas?

All I asked...

All i asked.. was to be strong, and HE gave me obstacles.

All i asked.. was to be wise, and HE gave me challenges.

All i asked.. was to be patient, and HE denied me my rightful opportunity.

All i asked.. was to be understanding, and HE gave me complexities.

All i asked.. was to be at peace with myself, and HE gave me insecurities.

All i asked.. was to be fair, and HE threw me in the middle of conflicts.

All i asked..

I almost gave up.. but just in the nick of time.. i realised that HE had given me all i had asked. just not in the manner that i was expecting.
Through overcoming obstacles(emotional, physical and mental), i became stronger. Plying through the challenges, i had become wiser than i was the day before. By waiting for my seemingly missed opportunities, i had learnt to be patient for my day to come. Tackling one complexed issue at a time, i gained understanding. By overcoming my insecurities one by one, i learnt more about myself thus becoming at peace with myself. Trust me, to subdue situations that involve conflict of interests.. you have to be fair minded.

Through all of these problems i realised one thing.
Life is made of obstacles, challenges, opportunities, complexities, insecurities, and conflicts. It is up to us how we are gonna handle it i guess. see the cup as half full or empty? Learnt so many lessons through my prayers...

Know what to ask and how to ask....
Ask not to be strong... instead, Ask for a donkey to carry your burden.
Ask not to be rich... instead.. Ask for others to be poorer than you.
Ask not to be wise... instead.. Ask for other to be dummer than you.
Ask not to be understanding.. instead.. Ask for the answers straight away..

get my drift? haha.. good nite all.

Kiasu..

'Kiasu' Added to Oxford English Dictionary!
Posted on Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Topic: Community Announcements

Quietly, and just like a Singaporean citizen, the humble Singlish word 'kiasu' migrated from its original home in the Coxford Singlish Dictionary to the pages of the Oxford English Dictionary - alongside other words like 'wiki' and 'ta-da'.

Check it out here at the OED's quarterly update site.
Hidden within the list of new entries somewhere 3/4 down the page (use the search function in your browser) is the word "kiasu" - n and adj. You can also do a 'search' on the OED's main page.

Which means that the word is now officially English too and we should be able to use it everywhere in our media with impunity.

Take that, you colonized, potato-eating monkeys of the Speak Good English Movement! Hopefully this isn't a belated April Fool's joke... if so, we'll be damn lau kwee. But then, it'd also be a cool prank! Either way, it puts a smile on our face.

For those of you hiding under a rock for the past 40-plus years, here's what 'kiasu' means (according to our very own Coxford):

KIASU (kee-ah-soo)
Hokkien adjective literally meaning, "afraid of losing". A highly pejorative description beloved of Singaporeans. Possibly our defining national characteristic. The nearest English equivalent is "dog in a manger", though even that is pretty mild in comparison.
"You went to get a handicapped sticker just to chope a parking space? How kiasu can you get?"

Thanks to Xuan You for pointing this out to us। Well done!

© http://www.TalkingCock.com 2001-2003। All rights reserved.

What's Next?

world's fastest supercomputer

What's the world's fastest supercomputer used for?

by Julia Layton

Protein molecules are the building blocks of the human body.

The world's fastest supercomputer will probably never be known as the world's fastest supercomputer. RIKEN's MDGrape-3 is the first machine to break the petaflop barrier -- that's 1 quadrillion calculations (floating-point operations, to be specific) per second -- and it's three times faster than the currently ranked fastest computer in the world, IBM's BlueGene/L. But MDGrape-3 is so specialized that it can't run the software used to officially rank computing speed. What it can do is determine the effect of any chemical compound on one of the most intricate systems in the human body in a couple of seconds.

MDGrape-3 is designed for pharmaceutical research, specifically molecular dynamics simulation. In developing drugs, pharmaceutical companies have to analyze thousands on thousands of chemical compounds to find out how they'll affect the protein-bonding structures in the human body. Protein structures called enzymes are the building blocks that do all of the work within a cell, and the way these proteins bond with any drug compound introduced into the human body determines the body's response to that drug. MDGrape-3 produces simulations of these molecular interactions. What takes most computers hours or days to analyze takes MDGrape-3 a few seconds. This functionality is invaluable in drug research, and it could drastically cut the research time involved in the development of new cures. A subsidiary of pharmaceutical giant Merck has already booked time on the machine.

Structurally speaking, MDGrape-3 is a parallel computing system consisting of two main sections: a primary server unit and a specialized-engines unit. The latter component is a cluster of 201 engines running proprietary chips developed by Riken specifically for MDGrape-3. It's this huge set of engines, running 24 MDGrape-3 chips each, that does the heavy protein-analysis lifting. Each chip has a maximum processing speed of 230 gigaflops (one billion operations per second). The primary server unit manages the engine cluster. This parallel server setup runs two different types of processors: 65 servers run dual-core Intel 5000-series Xeon processors, 256 per server; and 37 servers run 3.3-GHz Intel Xeon processors, each with 2 MB of level 1 cache, at 74 processors per server. This hardware structure enables the 1-petaflop speed, which is the machine's theoretical maximum for certain processes.

MDGrape-3 took $9 million and about four years to build. And it's actually very efficient -- a total cost of $9 million breaks down to about $15 per gigaflop. The slower BlueGene/L cost about $140 per gigaflop to build.

BlueGene/L, which tops out at a theoretical 360 teraflops (trillion calculations per second), is also a biotechnology-specific machine. The advances in speed marked by these two supercomputers is indicative of a general trend in technology toward biologically-slanted systems. Some say the trend really started with the successful mapping of the human genome in 2000. Regardless of what spurred the current biotechnology race, most experts agree that the logical end of the surge is a state of DNA-based medicine. In several decades, we could make an appointment with our doctor for a quick DNA analysis to find out what diseases we're at risk for and pop a single, gene-targeting pill that eliminates all of those foreseeable risks.

time's forgotten oaths

Kutti's birthday meet up set me thinking for sometime now. So much has changed.So much..

Rushing back home after a long school day, dumping the school bag at one corner and sending my Bata's flying to the other.. Just to change and rush down to play catching at the playground with friends.

Forging parents signature on my report card when my grades nose dived.

Skipping terawih prayers to sneak into the darkness of the then crescent field ( now safra mt faber) to light up the first salem.

joining a uniformed group for the first time. Marching in our uniforms and thrusting our chest to the skies. At the same time buckling down on our own weight and licking the floor in the name of push ups.

Jumping over the fence and catching True Lies at Bukit Merah.

The first testosterone driven fight under the void deck to defend the brotherhood.

Forging brotherhoods and partnerships in crime including vandalism, public nuisance, miniature rioting, theft of automobiles (almost), Chroming , smuggling, getting arrested... my goodness...

So much has happened. So much has sculpted us in our growing process. But most of the times its always the bad experiences that teaches lessons of life and tests the fortitude of friendships by melting them in a crucible. The purities glow, while the impurities vaporize. After all is said and done, there remains a few of us torn, tattered.. tried and tested but still hand in hand, shoulder to shoulder, brother to brother. Hence an unsaid oath is taken.. to be brothers for ever in the unshakable faith that nothing can pull us apart.... but life has other plans... adulthood.

Adulthood; priorities change, lifestyles change, times change. Friends change. Its sad to see that the friendship that withstood the battering obstacles of growing up, was succumbing to the subtle influences of adulthood and was diluting away day by day. The great adventures we had back then has now reduced to coffeeshop table top talks or sms'... pathetic. But beggars can't be choosers. i am getting tired.. can't keep it together anymore.i accept defeat. No one wrote rules as to how to live our lives and yet we conform ourselves to a mould.. a mould which no one wants to break.

Then, there is the other sort. The "phasers", people who categorize friends accordingly to the phases of life.. Once the phase is over, so is the friendship. What so difficult in keeping the old friends when making new ones? Anyway its none of my concern anymore..

So much trial and tribulations. So much lost in the past decade. So much hurt. But if not for all these, i wouldn't have known who were the real deal. Thus i would hereby take this opportunity to let you know that i am truly honored by your friendship, Chanthi, Ali and Shan.. Here is my Oath of friendship to you.

Oath of friendship

When you are sad....I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.

When you are blue...I'll try to dislodge whatever it is that is choking you.

When you smile...I'll know you finally got laid.

When you are scared...I will rag you about it every chance I get.

When you are worried...I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whining.

When you are confused...I will use little words to explain it to your dumb ass.

When you are sick...stay the hell away from me until you're well again. I don't want whatever you have.

When you fall...I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

PS: A good friend will be there to bail you out of jail. Your best friend will be the one sitting next to you saying, "That was f***ing awesome!"

PS 2 : For those also close friends of mine( alot of close ones out there) who are not mentioned... this is not an academy award॥ so dun come and hound me as to why i didnt list your names.. you know that i love and cherish you all the same...and have shown you my affection in one way or another.. so shut up.... ;)

PS 3 : PS 2 is not a diplomatic and damage controlling statement to appease the unmentioned heroes and heroines of my life..